Now that I am edging towards the second half of my thirties, there are a few things that my mother definitely never covered in our mother daughter chats. Although I am not sure I would have believed her even if she’d told me…
- You will look in the mirror one day and not recognise yourself. This will happen overnight and you’re certain that you didn’t look like this yesterday.
- You don’t know what’s at number one and have never heard of half the songs in the download chart. Music also sounds louder at lower volumes even though you know you used to play songs at a level eight – the six is now quite loud enough thank you.
- You will get hangovers even if you used to come home in the early hours and arise fresh and rested after two hours sleep. You lost three days in recovery time the last time you got drunk.
- You will be able to keep more than one bottle of vino in the house without drinking it. In fact you have a rack that has wine in it!
- You will enjoy staying in more than dressing up.
- You are inexplicably attracted to the colour beige when clothes shopping and have a bit of a moment, consequently bursting into tears and needing a stiff drink to sort you out.
- You will walk into rooms and forget what you went in for. You will then stand for about ten minutes before checking the internet to see what the early signs of Alzheimer’s are.
- Hair starts to grow in unusual places even if you are a woman, it’s just that nobody talks about it.
- You will start to wear flat shoes even if previously you haven’t been seen in anything less than four inches. Ballet shoes become your new go-to.
- The garden starts to become interesting and you find yourself at the weekend going to the garden centre and spending an extraordinary amount of time looking at plants.
So what have you noticed that you think should be in the life manual?
Comments, as always, welcome.
- The New Old Age Blog: The Ex Factor (newoldage.blogs.nytimes.com)
- An Anthropological Study of Women in Their Mid Thirties (ctworkingmoms.com)